I thank the members of my book group, and their input to a discussion of the Arbinger Institutue’s book, The Anatomy of Peace, for pushing me out of silence and back to a commitment to write, post, speak up. I have been aware of how withdrawn I have become, and given myself a variety of explanations for my changed behavior, not recognizing when the explanations morphed into excuses and my silence ceased to be healthy.
In my defense, I will point out the many letters I have written back to columnists when something I read in their opinion pieces triggered me. What I did not do, and now intend to undertake, is to share those responses here, probably with additional commentary that updates the ideas to today’s context.
Not because I expect my words to “make a difference”, but because I expect of myself to resume living by my long held belief that my purpose in this life is to manifest as best I can the Truths I know. For me that manifestation process has largely been verbal, whether speaking with friends, engaged in counseling with clients, managing an agency, writing newspaper features, or posting to this blog.
In allowing outer world circumstances to silence me, I have perhaps not betrayed myself, in that I have reoriented and reprioritized values, and can claim that I have used the time to make an important transition on my inner, spiritual life Path. But I recognize as well that my silence has extended longer than it needed to. It is time to resume speaking up, speaking out.
To begin, I will pose a question that has floated around me and my close circle for some time now. What is the difference between being older and being elderly? And why is being an elder a term of respect in many contexts, while being elderly is so often portrayed as being feeble, dependent, no longer valuable?
I am definitely older. I am not averse to being termed an elder, with its connotations of wiser, experienced, knowledgeable. I have spent much of the past couple years fighting with my body, and thus myself, about becoming elderly in the negative sense. It is challenging to learn how to remain an engaged, contributing individual when pain and fatigue dominate one’s awareness. I have found it especially challenging in the present socially contentious, nay viciously ugly public times.
What I can do, and am no longer willing to excuse myself from doing, is add to the positive, hopefully encouraging and creative content floating in the ether. The more seeds scattered, the greater the chance of a productive harvest.
Tags: communication, self-acceptance
1eclecticwriter 
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